Pre-marital counseling...check.
Reading a plethora of books about marriage...check.
Marriage mentor...check.
Just about any kind of pre-marital help and information we can fathom is no more than a click or phone call away. Yet, nothing (and I mean, NOTHING) can prepare us for marriage. We just have to experience it for ourselves.
Sometimes we leave momma's house to enter the marriage home. Sometimes we've lived alone, settled in our own routines, before we enter marriage. Either way, marriage is an entirely new world.
Even though we dated for five years, nothing could have prepared my husband for the fact that when we married, I couldn't cook. I literally almost set the kitchen on fire while boiling water. Nothing could have prepared me for the fact that my husband can't sit still. He likes to be busy...all the time. Those are things we had to learn about one another...quickly.
Nothing can fully prepare us to completely accept another person in all their fullness. And absolutely nothing can prepare us for what comes with most marriages: in-laws. And nothing can prepare us for the feelings we will feel about our spouse, our in-laws, the things we learn about one another during marriage.
Nothing can really prepare us for those first marriage holidays, when we're consumed with stress over which family we're going to visit at what time, making sure that neither family's feelings are hurt. Nothing can prepare us for the excitement we feel when our spouse brings home that very first surprise "just because." Nothing can prepare us for the disappointment we feel when that first argument occurs.
Marriage is a series of trials, errors and constant education. We learn things we never knew about ourselves, and we learn things about our spouse. And, just when we think we're through learning,
everything changes,
and there arise new marital situations and circumstances from which to learn.
Marriage is what we make of it. It's hard work. It's a learning process. We must choose to offer our spouse...
sacrifice
unconditional love
acceptance
forgiveness.
And nothing can prepare us for the beauty of marriage that happens when we choose these.
I think the fact that I was best friends with my husband for eight years helped to prepare me for marriage. To be honest, I was not surprised, because I already knew what his weaknesses were. But as time goes on, more difficult times get thrown at us, and our love matures. Definitely.
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