I learned several years ago that when I am exhausted, I am no good to anyone. I have a hard time focusing my attention on God. I can't meditate on His Word. I am cranky with my family. And I tend to be overly sensitive. I am there. I am tired. For the past two weeks, I've been pushing myself just to maintain the daily routine. And it has caught up with me. I need rest.
Tonight my husband took the kids and went to his parents' so I could have a break. I so need this break. I went to a movie...alone! I've never been to a movie alone. It was nice. I didn't have to share my popcorn or coke. I sat through the credits. Then I went to Target and meandered through the clothes and shoes...just because I could. I wasn't on anyone's schedule.
Now I sit here, alone, and attempt to write. I've not written a blog post in over a week. I've been empty. I sit down to write, attempt a few sentences, and end up walking away. I realize I don't have much to say when I haven't spent time meditating on God's Word.
Tomorrow I plan to rest. I plan to sleep late. I might go to the park for a run. I'll probably have coffee with my best friend. And I hope to have a nice, long, uninterrupted nap. I have a multitude of projects running through my head that I should tackle while I am without children, but I won't. I plan to be quiet, and let God speak to me. I don't hear Him when I am tired. I don't actually know if it's that He's not speaking, or if it's that I'm so intent on just getting through the day that I don't hear Him. I plan to find out tomorrow.