My middle child, a bit of a creative writer already, asked me last night: Mom, don't you write to help people? I replied, Yes, I hope to...that's my goal.
Then that same creative, inquisitive child asked me: What's the hardest thing about life? Oh my. I had to stop and carefully choose my words before I answered. After thinking for a moment, I answered: Being yourself.
My questioning child didn't stop there. She then asked, What's another hard thing about life? I immediately knew my answer, but had to bite my tongue until I could find the appropriate way to answer. I finally said, Being nice to those who aren't nice to you.
My goal when I write here is to be myself, to share what I often find hard to verbalize, and to do it in such a way that {hopefully} others will gain something from it. However, there are times when it's just hard. There are times when I agonize over phrasing so as not to offend anyone. There are times when I spend an hour writing only to chicken out of clicking the Publish button because I fear what others will think. Still, unfortunately, there are those who are just going to find issue with anything I write.
And therein is the hard part of life: continuing to be myself and do what I know I've been called to do in the face of opposition. Part of me wants to do what's easy: give up and return to people pleasing. The other part of me knows I'll be miserable if I do.
So when my daughter's final question was, Mom, can I write a blog too?, I was aware that I am setting an example to her. The question I ask myself is this: Do I want her to see me quit what I know God has called me to do in order to please a few people? The answer is a resounding No! My hope for her is that she learns to pursue her God-given talents in a way that fulfills her dreams and helps others despite opposition.
I totally know how you feel... So many unpublished posts, so much of still finding my voice. I say that you read Jeff Goins little book - "You Are a Writer, so Start Acting Like One." I want to give up all the time, but at the same time, I can't. If you have a kindle, I can loan it to you. It's a tiny book. But the gist of it is write, and you will find your voice. He talks about platform too, but what he says is that when we are true to ourselves, people read. He also said you have to make relationships with others as well.
ReplyDeleteAnyhow, I would miss you if you stopped blogging. Even when I disagree, I am still a big fan. :)
Thanks, Jamie. I've been wanting to read that book, so I'd love to borrow it. I have a Kindle app...will that work?
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